"I'm sorry." Those were the words that Alan Chang saw on his phone. The message was from his ex-girlfriend, Helen. She had learned that he had just gotten out of his relationship with Alice.
He knew that getting back together was foolish, but he wanted his pain to go away. "Do you want to grab a cup of coffee?"
***
"Do you remember our special time in that janitorial closet?" Helen awkwardly played with her hair.
"It was so ratchet," Alan hung his head. "I would never do that again."
The smell of coffee lingered in the air. Helen was disappointed. She had chosen this cafe specifically because she knew it had 7 different closets.
"Can I get anything for you?" Their young waitress stood at an outstanding 5'7.5 and smelled of finely aged 26-year-old musk. "My name is Chanel."
***
The rest of the date had not gone well. After the two stepped outside for a moment, Helen's phone had been stolen. Chanel had informed them that the suspect was reported to be a 5'7 Tibetan woman with a strange affinity for small goods. The waitress' harem of Asian men had tried to track the woman down, but had lost sight of her.
"Let's check the janny's closet." Alan said in jest. But Helen took it seriously, and led Alan to a closet. When they opened the door, they were shocked to find a beautiful woman. The girl's name was Tumbling. Her face was supple like a mooncake. Her hands were sullied by years of working as an Unpaid Janitor at a soon-to-be defunct Yang's Coffee Shop. Her black, thick framed glasses in combination with her straight jet black hair were as mesmerizing as Datman's sexual adventures in Poland. It was love at first sight. She displayed a rare combination of will, intellect and physical vigor.
Alan was smitten. What he didn't know... was that Tumbling felt the same way.
***
It was sudden, but Alan and Tumbling immediately left the cafe together to find a closet at a Toys R' Us.
"Do you have an IG?" Alan asked to break the ice.
"Yes, but wasn't it rude to just leave that girl you were with?"
Alan placed his finger on Tumbling's lips and hushed her. "I only need Tumbling now."
Their eyes locked and they could feel the intimacy. They could feel each other's warmth emanating from the other, the warmth of their breath on one another... Slowly, as if two magnets drawn to each other, they came together.
Alan, the 6'2'' incel, leaned in closer. "I've got you cornered now."
Liking the dominance, Tumbling, the 5'3'' vulnerable janitor with no future prospects, stepped closer, slowly undoing her buttoned up shirt... She leveraged one of the storage boxes in the janitor's room to get closer to Alan's lips. Their lips almost touched... before--
"STOP!" It was Helen scantily dressed. She had tracked them down, visibly upset that the coffee date had turned out so badly. Tumbling frantically stooped down in shame and ran out of the janitor's room only for Alan to chase her. Helen was dismayed that he would fall for a girl who seemingly had nothing going for her. "Why did you run away from me? And for THAT girl?"
Alan tried to find an answer in his heart, but no answer could describe the feeling he had for Tumbling. All he knew for sure was one thing: "Helen... You and I are over".